if you are from a upbeat sunny state you may discard that message. 



Finding pain with Robin Williams


Celebrity deaths are interesting.. Some say how can you care so much about this one person when there is many dying every day.

I tend not to care about what some say.  

I cant help but breathe funny, somewhat scatterbrained, questionable.

I received a text message from my brother about the passing of Robin Williams. I think everything in my body stopped working for a second, it may have been different if it were natural causes but regardless it has had me thinking very hard ever since I unlocked my iphone to read that text.  

Creatives tend to have issues deep inside, sometimes they creep out and sometimes issues stay hidden and locked forever. I've come to learn that being a creative when you are beyond in it where you live love eat breathe  sleep your passion, there is also unfulfillment pain doubt failure dreams disappointments. Finding a balance is key, maintaining that balance isn't always easy.  

The creative Robin Williams is a one of without a doubt. 

 From the kid that is still inside me who enjoyed the classic films that he is best known for to the adult that I am now who had just last year was introduced to the film 'Toys' which blew my mind.

And remaining a creative into my older years who may be fighting my own type of demons will never forget who Robin Williams is and what he has done creatively.

Even the funniest man has a breaking point, only thing we can do is strive to better ourselves which as we all know is a never ending task.

Thank you for making me laugh from my childhood and beyond.


- bsmitty


Guest Writer - Dustin Sterling

Through life we learn. Through learning we love. Through love we hate. Life is essentially your mind shifting like sand through an hour glass back and forth. Once you truly see the brightest light, the old standby this too shall pass comes into play. It's counterpart and less desirable form of matter, darkness, isn't far around the corner to rear it's seemingly ugly head. Through this experience we both flourish and suffer. And through these things, we grow stronger and more aware of our surroundings and state of mind. We cave in to temptations, we make mistakes, we feel like life will cease to exist at times, but at the end of it all, you grow through these so called evils that lurk in the shadows and cause us to veer off the trail taking us to light. It's funny, because as a human being, your life can be seemless. Meaning you could be the happiest person on this planet, or at least the happiest in your own world, but you will still stray at times from that happiness. I truly believe this is due to mans desire for knowledge and thwarting our greatest fear ; that which we do not know. If curiosity killed the cat, then by all means, it stole my car, spit on my face, and left me to die in a ditch somewhere.... But it didn't kill me, for that which is the lowest of lows. The darkest pit of sorrow. What seems like our final hour of nauseating stomach and excruciatingly sharp chest pain, is nothing more than a great trial by fire, which we as the wonderful species of man, will endure. And in that breath, dare I say overcome?And emerge. As a being stronger willed, and more enlightened than that which we were, pre-agony. In your darkest days, and your coldest nights, grip your fists as tight as you can. Because people, you will stand tall again. And you will be taller. And you will see more clearly. Hear more precise, and speak louder than that which you were capable of in the last skin of a person you have shed and left to die in that ditch where your wrong turn led you. You will be greater than before, until your next endeavor into the darkness. And so on and so on. Just as life is a cycle of life and death, so will be your own mission of darkness and of light. A truly good heart will overcome any adversary. No matter how powerful. No matter how malicious. We are life itself, and we are all light.


A pick me up vid

I will often rewatch a video often to keep my head clear, motivated, and moving forward.

This is a great one of Adam Savage speaking about Dodos, The Maltese Falcon, and the creative exercise. 

Guest Writer - John K. Beaver


Thump-thump. Thump-thump. Thump-thump.

 The strange beat is the first sound I hear. My first sense of awareness is that noise. It is inside me and surrounds me like a cocoon. I can feel life coursing and swirling in the atmosphere. There is warmth and comfort cradling me; keeping me safe…

 LIGHT! Blinding, painful light. The cold air sends pain shooting throughout my being. Alien creatures, nothing more than blobs of color, rush in and out of existence. A loud squelching noise fills my head. I become aware that I am making the noise, but I do not know how or why…

 Peace. I see my Creator’s face. Its hair brushes my insides. A gurgle noise bursts from me. I cannot control it. My Creator blows a soft breeze into my sight, making the world darken and lighten in cycles. Suddenly a stench poisons the air. My Creator reaches for me. I feel my being rising in the air…

 I have hands and feet! I can grasp my feet with my hands! How quaint that my Creator endowed me with such amazing appendages. I never realized how vast the world really is. I feel terrified and exhilarated at the same time. My capacity for mischief has increased ten-fold…

 Mobility! I am not steady on my feet, but I am capable of transporting myself from one location to another. My Creator is always chasing me. I believe It is a She, and She has amazing powers. She can move at great speeds, produce objects out of nothing, and perform miracles. She is truly a God!

 Communication! I can now use the strange sounds I produce to convey predetermined meanings to my Creator. When I pray for a toy, She will produce it. If I am hungry and ask for food, She is at hand to feed me. Even if I am tired and do not use my words, She knows what I need and accommodates me. There cannot be a more powerful being…

 I am old. Too old to remember how old I am. I cannot speak. I cannot remember anything worth speaking of. My body is unable to sustain itself. My legs, once strong, can barely hold my fragile frame. My hands are no longer able to grip even my bedside. There is almost no circulation to my feet.

 My sight is diminishing. Breathing is a labor. My lungs are loose in my chest. My organs are slowly failing. I am dying. It will not be much longer. I can feel my mind slipping further into the darkness. Nothing exists for me anymore; except the beat. It grows weaker and weaker.

 Thump-thump. Thump – thump. Thump…

 Thump-thump. Thump-thump. Thump-thump.

 The strange beat is the first sound I hear…


aLIVE episode 9

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Being lost in a dream




I often get asked what I am shooting photos for and it is easy for me just to say "Oh they are just for my website" to give a justifiable answer so I can simply dodge the question. It is hard to explain photography, there is something inside that you know what works and what does not work. Similar to a filmmaker, if he or she were to tell you what the film means it will ruin your interpretation of it. The beauty of being creative is that it is all on you.. You can choose to photograph flowers and pretty things, you can choose to photograph sports or weddings, or you can get lost and dream. I tend to get lost and enter a dream when I am photographing and I try to get to that place as much as possible... and the thing about being lost in a dream is that you'll find yourself with images that are so beautiful and tell yourself WAIT I could find something even more beautiful so I must stagger on.



Is that a mirror in your pocket?

I decided a great way to get this blog goin is to empty my pockets.

Always thinking creatively ultimately leads me to full pockets and this is what I have going on these days..




iPhone 5 - I could not imagine having a different brand of phone, my brain cant slow down to the speed of competitors devices, I feel like my brain glitches as there device is trying to load something or trying to simply swipe to another screen. I went with the 16gb version which was a terrible idea since I fill it up constantly but by doing so keeps me backing up files more often which is a good thing. The camera on this phone is great, the 5s is sure to be better but I am content with this phone for now.. It's really a photo document device and I wish it had existed when I were young.

iPod touch - it is brilliant for reading since I dont get distracted with texts or calls when reading... and... another back up camera when needed.

Timberland wallet - I ran into this wallet when I was in the market for one and it really is the perfect wallet. I bet you are wondering John Cusack?  My brother stuck that ripped out picture of him and stuck it in a birthday card he got me almost 10 years ago! I stuck it in my wallet that day and have kept it with me ever since.

Olloclip - A new purchase over the past weekend, I have only tested it mostly in low light with Ryder and it managed to capture a decent image. Looking forward to messing with it more.

Fujifilm XQ1 - Not many people carry a pocket camera on them anymore... You should! iPhones are great for documenting and they are the best if that is the only camera on you. What a pocket camera can do is give you more options if you are without a bigger camera. I've come to love shooting with the on camera flash WEIRD RIGHT? There is something beautiful about that tiny flash that is on that camera. I feel if William Eggleston was my age in this era of technology the xq1 would be one of his cameras and everyone would hate on him for using it and calling it art... Just like how he had been made fun of when he was younger after a showing of his work at MOMA, now he is known as a legend from those same photographs. Another thing to point out about a pocket camera is space.. SPACE AND LOTS OF IT, I have a 32gig memory card in my xq1 and my info shows I can shoot over 10,000 photographs. I recommend the xq1 to anyone looking to buy a pocket camera... Great price, great size and the flash option actually gives a great look, bad thing is that it is terrible at high ISO but keep it down with the flash and you'll be stoked. My friend has the Sony rx100ii or the iii either way that camera seems insane, have not heard much about high iso but ive seen some low light images that do look amazing. I just really like what fuij has been doing with photography the past years though, I hope that they will also be coming out with a 1 inch sensor pocket camera. 

So there you have it... My pockets full of photography options. 

The photos on this blog will  have a caption of the camera used and random info if needed.

Thanks for lurking! PLEASE SHARE- There is a share link below this and every post or simply tell everyone on the Facebook planet to check out the new blog


Here. We. Go.

I am excited on this new blog I'll be posting photos, also throwing my thoughts out there about photography and other useless knowledge.

If you have not noticed I'm terrible at grammar... That wont change.. Well, hopefully over time I will become better at it.




Okay, look forward to some great photographs, random creativeness, fun, and something that is better than reading depressing posts on Facebook! 

Also, I have been in touch with a handful of creative people to do a guest post on this blog, some may be a one time post and some may be ongoing. 

5. Comments are now available on any post so leave some feedback!

Thanks for lurking! 


Ruth Stretar and thoughts of Richard Avedon

aLIVE episode 8 featuring Ruth Stretar is up! CLICK HERE TO WATCH

Shooting these episodes has been a absolutely great time to do and I am excited every time I schedule the next episode. Ruth took some convincing but as you'll see her episode is deep and full of real emotion.

The question I have been asked the most about the aLIVE project is 'why' or 'what does it mean' or 'what is this for'... Really this idea came into my head during this past winter, living in Ohio it gives you many months of not being able to enjoy nice weather which leads to long nights left with your own thoughts, and for me is when I can push my creative thoughts forward. I think of Richard Avedon often (I wish I could have met him) and Avedon is a photographer that passed the year I started shooting.. But it was years before I knew who Avedon was. I am not sure when I was actually introduced to his lifes work but whenever that was it really changed my life, much like how a motivational book can change someones life.

When I look through 'IN THE AMERICAN WEST' I stare at the photos and get lost to that moment, Laura Wilson did a great documentation of his journey and some amazing stories are involved but Avedon being the photographer and creative mind is what I am talking about, being IN that moment dealing with the elements and talking face to face and really being a extension of that subject during that time

-how did the introduction to the particular person go

-what type of conversations were struck up 

-what happened immediately after the photographs were taken

Those and many more thoughts go through my mind and I wanted to create those feelings... unscripted, real thoughts, how the person carried themselves at this time of life, just being IN it. The gracious people involved with the aLIVE project have a real conversation and each person has been so unique and seeing the time stopped dead with the single photograph at the end secluded in front of a white background takes me to that place that I felt with Avedon's work in the west.

Enjoy the latest episode of Ruth Stretar and watch the other episodes if you haven't yet!

*please use the share button below*


Extra! Extra!

It's been... Well years since I have ran a 'real' blog. More of the recent blogs I had going were places to post a photograph, I guess I might have felt discouraged of the idea of writing but the great thing about time and age is that you find out more about yourself and life in general. This is my first true blog and I am very excited to run it and will be including creative writers from time to time to collaborate with my photographs or for any other random reason I see fit! I am glad to have a home for photographs I normally wouldn't add to a portfolio collection and even random photos I have on my iPhone or xq1.

Unsafe hillbomb on skateboard selfie with Kristian Svitak 

Unsafe hillbomb on skateboard selfie with Kristian Svitak 

So over the past week I've been super busy on a filming/photography mission with Svitak and it was very successful! I will update when and where the video/photos show up at after the sponsors review what we ended up with. 

The aLIVE series will be back on its normal schedule tomorrow so keep lurking!